I wasn’t flying I was falling
but suspended in air
I was hurt I was crying
I needed you there
you were gone
you were missing
you ran away
and now I’m left and I’m lonely
it’s just another day
A day in my life
come on and walk in my shoes
A day in my hell
singing the blues
a lost kid a found soul
reckless to a fault
Get to know who I am
just leave me to fall
Not fly
suspended in air.
© O’Connor, 2016
Help me down
I’ve been up here for so long
I can’t see my feet way down under me
Where did the world go?
Where did the ground go?
Help my down.
I don’t want to be up here anymore.
I want out
I want my feet back
I want the street back
I wanted to be up here
I wanted to see the view
Didn’t know it meant losing myself
losing you
I didn’t know
Help me down from this heavenly looking hell
Help me down.
©O’Connor, 2016
Stab me in the back to see if I bleed.
Stab me in the heart out of curiosity.
Rip out my soul to see if it’s there.
Hurt me all you want I truly don’t care.
What will happen?
If I don’t bleed
If I’m not hurt
If it’s not there
Do you think I am a lifeless machine?
Oh honey, I’m like nothing you’ve ever seen.
©C. O’Connor, 2016
©C. O’Connor, 2016
Have you ever known the air in your hair
or the touch of harm?
Have you ever known the wisp of breath
or heat of the sun?
Do you know the middle place of heat to cold
or the prayer not to get too old?
Do you know the wish for peace in a world
lost to war?
lost to ego
lost to pay
lost to the amenities to get through the day
They are lost in their own minds
They are focused on their own grind
They don’t even see you
not me
not see
no fear no feelings
fight or flight is dumbed down
muted
no running
sitting duck, ready to be rocked
ready to be obliterated
ready to fall
down below
where no one knows
the air, touch, wisp, or heat
where no pain, feels, or emotions seep
there is nothing, all new
I’ve known this hell. I’ve thrived there.
Have you?
©C. O’Connor, 2016
I’m gonna drag you through the cleaners
wonder if “deep clean” can fix your mess
can I bleach the grime and rust away?
when is the last time you used this thing?
or gave it some fresh air
or took it out for a spin
or felt anything at all
It’s a shame to let it waste away in here
does it even still work?
WD-40 and duct tape should get it going
… It explains a lot though
you’ve been reckless
apathetic
the world doesn’t exist
So, you’ve kept it locked up in here.
too long
let it waste and decay
No worries though
I can get the stains out.
I’ll drag you through the cleaners.
©C. O’Connor, 2016
are you hurting like me?
are you broken like me?
has your soul given up the fight?
do you cry like me?
do you hide like me?
do you find solace in the darkness of the night? 
©C. O’Connor, 2016
My name is Darkness
My name is Fear
My name is anything that haunts you dear.
My name is Hate
My name is Cold
My name is all your nightmares hold.
My name is fixed
My name is all
My name is in every lost soul’s call.
I am here
I am there
I am within the darkest stare.
I am the shadows
I am the light
I am the thing haunting your dreams at night.
My name is forgotten
My name is unknown
My name is in the shiver on your neck when you think you are alone.
©C. O’Connor, 2016
I just ripped off a piece of my skin.
I ripped off my soul.
Slowly
Painfully
Ripping
Shearing a piece of myself away.
Now I am a little less of what I was
only minutes before.
©C. O’Connor, 2016
Maybe I’m broken?
Maybe I let down.
Possibly the light will end
the road will drown
and life will cry out loud.
©C. O’Connor, 2016
The Rant 